Overheard in the Newsroom
Baby Got Back?

*following an earthquake*

Operations Director: “It was long. It wasn’t strong.”

Community Editor: “BUT, it was down to get its friction on.”

Assistant Digital Editor: “MY ANACONDA DON’T WANT NONE …”

Reporter & Assistant Digital Editor: “UNLESS YOU GOT BUNS HUN!”

Director (about Overdrive machine): “God damn, I can’t go a day where it doesn’t do something I don’t understand.”
Producer: “That’s how I feel about my girlfriend.”

Assistant editor: I wore a tie today.
*Photographer slow claps*
Assistant editor: I get no respect around here. 

School reporter: “I can’t believe I’m writing a 15 inch story on paper wigs. Sometimes I feel like a drunken sailor. Just throwing whatever garbage I can find in here.”

Angry caller: “You’re gonna make me famous, puttin’ me in the paper for shootin’ that house!”

Cops reporter: “Excuse me, sir - you mean ‘infamous.’”

Reporter 1: “You’re very giggly today.” 

Reporter 2: “I’m reading comments on our Facebook page.” 

 

Reporter (whispers): “It’s 6 p.m. and I’m done for today…” 

Other reporter: “Run, run as fast as you can.” 

Me: “My monitor is broken.”

Editor: “If you type carefully that shouldn’t matter.”

via @JesseAPaul

Web editor: I always spell “refrigerator” wrong.

Education reporter: Me too. I always want to put a ‘D’ in it.

(A brief pause, then followed by an inappropriate giggle fit.)

Assistant Editor: She wouldn’t give you her age?

Reporter: No.

News Editor: What’s her village and middle initial? I’ll get you her age. I have the 2008 voter registration list. I’ve got her birthdate.

Copy editor 1: With a completely serious expression. “I have a very important question to ask you.”

Copy editor 2: “What’s that?”

Copy editor 1: “Is it 50 cent corn dog day?”

Copy editor 2: Frantically searches on google. “It is!!”

Copy editor 1: “How many do you want?”

Editor bemoaning tech problem: “Triple murders have been solved more quickly.”

Online Issues

Editor referring to graphic sent by corporate IT department he has contacted many times about a new website: “I don’t understand what this is.”

Sports Editor: “Is it just a giant middle finger?”

Local criminals

Reporter 1, on seeing accused arsonist in court: “He seemed like a really nice guy.”

Reporter 2: “… who just happened to set a hotel on fire.”

"If I bite kids, I’m going to get bit" - reporter on what kids learn in kindergarten.